To add to the chaos you might consider throwing a few ferrets into the fray, these ill tempered, aglie and permanently hungry beasts, like all members of the weasel familky have teeth as sharp and needles and incredibly powerful jaws for creatures of their size. They also have a penchant for getting inside trousers.

Once there of course they will use their powerful jaws to sink their needle sharp teeth into anything that looks like a sausage.

In days of yore a popular sport, some might say a rite of passage in nothern England (where men are men and women are double breasted,) was for groups of young men eager to prove their courage to each insert a ferret in their trousers and the one who held out longest before screaming for medical help was declared the winner and had the right to claim the favours of a woman of his choice.

And because ferrets breed like rabbits they are idea for use in carpet bombing campaigns as stocks are quickly replaced.

Consider including ferrets in your strategy, an enemy advance could be plunged into chaos if half the advancing troops suddenly found they were trying to fight a battle with the most ferocious members of genus mustelidae hanging from their members.

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Opted for comfortable retirement before I was fifty due to health problems and burn out. Now spend my time writing and goofing around. Home: northern England..

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